Saturday, April 09, 2005

The hardness of the butter is proportional to the softness of the bread

Let me start off by saying, I hate joe. just read his blog and the comments afterwords. I don't want to talk about it.
On a lighter note, wait, how can a note be lighter? it can be higher, but not lighter, I'll get back to you on that one. Anywho, most of you who read my blog were with me on the BBQ I'm about to expound on, so if you want to, skip over this next pragraph. only if you really feel the need to though.
Oh, did I mention I hate joe?
We, Toni(wait Ton"Y", I can't tell them apart anymore) and Tony, Michelle, joe, ____________________________________________________________and I (didn't want my name on the same line as joe's) went to utah lake and had a BBQ. I even had sausage and didn't get sick! The stars were beautiful and we had an awsome fire thanks to the fire master Toni.(sorry, did it again, Ton"Y") While Michelle and joe made out in the car, Toni, Tony and I built up the fire, cooked all the meat, and went to find a man about a horse. When Michelle and joe came back(you notice I'm not capitalizing joe's name? I think it's because I hate him) we ate the food, roasted(our bodies anyway) by the fire, were questioned by a cop, trespassed on private property, filled our clothing and shoes with sand, lost some beanies, and of course made sand castles. It was the best time I've had out with my friends in a long time. Thank you buddy buds(except jerk, I mean joe) After the fire died and hypothermia set in, joe and Tony collapsed in exhaustion, started turning blue and Michelle had to give them mouth to mouth recessitation. Then the lochness monster(who apparently goes by bob) came out of the lake on the beach and carried joe and Tony to the car. We then rushed home in attempts to save their lifes, but alas, they died. The End

Great story huh? I think I'll send it in for publishing one of these days. It was such a great story, here is the sequal. We brought in tony and joe's bodies into the house and laid them on the couches. While they were decaying, Toni Michelle and I started talking about them. Their bodies were in the room, but their souls weren't so we figured we could talk about them. very weird, It's like talking about someone behind their backs, while they're in the same room with you. Back to the story. We decided to dump the bodies at joe's old apartment(old meaning, he doesn't live there anymore because he's dead) to let his roommates take care of the remains.

The next morning we decided to have waffles for breakfast. We started cooking them, Their beautiful fragrance filled the air, so crisp, brown and scrumptious, when all of a sudden, Tony and joe's souls popped into the room. Tony with a halo and a harp, and joe with horns and a tail. They had come for revenge of the gossipping we did the night before when they were decaying on the couches. they had heard every word! We begged for mercy,"take anything but the waffles! they're innocent!" Tony was willing, but joe was unmerciful. He ate them like you've never seen someone eat waffles before. And I've seen a lot of waffle eaters in my day. anyway joe ate the waffles, and us girls went hungry the rest of the day. as far as we know Tony and joe(who I still hate even though he's dead) have returned to their respective kingdoms and all is well with the world.

Well now to my evening. I WENT TO STOMP AND IT WAS AWSOME! It is so much better live than just in their movies. It was SO COOL! it wasn't just the percussion part either. It had a lot of comedy too. After words we( my whole extended family on my dad's side) went to Sizzler for dinner. MMMMMMMMMMMMMM........................................................STEAK.............................MMM.
Then when we were all finished eating and just chatting, she pulled out a ginormous cake. And guess who the cake was for? MMMEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!! well, a third of it was mine. My uncles birthday is tomorrrow, and my cousins' was yesterday. Mine isn't until next week, but still My name was on it! When we blew out the candles I wished for the usual: car, $100,000 , world peace, a boyfriend, a life, and of course, a lifetime supply of gushers. Hope they all come true. Wait, does that mean I'll only get a third of each wish? I guess I could live with less than $100,000, I suppose i could share the car with my uncle and cousin, world peace.......whatever............., I'll live with a third of a life, third lifetime supply of gushers will do, but the boyfriend thing? does that mean he'd be two thirds gay? or cheat on me with two other girls? Oh well, I guess I'm never meant to be in a relationship.
Oh, commenting on Toni's comment, we should definately do the whole BBQ thing again. Once a month! I even have a blow up boat and paddle I can bring next time. We can turn it into our monthly ritual. Hey! we can even sacrifice joe at the next one! wait, he's already dead. nevermind. I still hate him.
I'm going to have to fast all day tomorrow to make up for all the food I consumed yesterday and today. Is it wrong to fast and your purpose(spiritual) to lose weight? I guess if I'm not struck down by lightning then It's alright.
My poor kitty missed me. when i came home, he practically jumped off the bed to come see me. and thet's not an easy thing to do for a 21 year old cat. Well, I'm sure I've bored you long enough with my ramblings. must go and check my e-mail now. Oh, My dad sent me an............."interesting" song I'll send to you all. tootles


  1. ok. sorry about the comment. however, i must say that anyone who reads my blog and knows you knows better than the think that! when i read your blog, i couldn't figure out what you were so mad at me about, so i had to go back and read my blog. by the way, the horns and tail were a nice touch. that, and the sacrificing sounds like fun! i'm all stoked for the next bbq!
    luv ya tonz!
    your buddy,

    p.s. - i don't know if i can live with the fact that you hate me. if i give you gushers and a big hug next time i see you, will you forgive me? on credit? i'd appreciate it. just let me know...

  2. i love you, becca. please be my friend ;)

  3. you should forgive him. he sounds desperate. If I were this mad at him, he would just say "whatever" til I forgave him. You're lucky. He got all desperate. Shows how much more he loves you!

  4. oh toni! i wouldn't say whatever! i'd beg forgiveness for a little while, and then say whatever once it became apparent that you were not going to forgive me for at least 10 minutes. then i wait a little while, give you a hug (or try to) and talk you into liking me again! it doesn't always work, but it sure does help sometimes.

  5. Oh, you just love to antagonize me. That is our little game. I have come to accept it. Siiigh.